Snapshots of Our Life: The Boy

One of my all-time favorite gifts that we have given our children's birth parents has got to be the "Day in the Life Of" books (the everyday things they do and say). Because I always want to remember them at different stages of their lives, I thought it would be great to have a snapshot of our lives, a spotlight of sorts.

 Let me introduce you to The Boy (aka Mr. L). He is 7 years old and constantly reminding us that he is about to turn 8. He has also been eating like a horse and has grown over 2" in the last two months (what in the world!). When I tell him he needs to stop growing he says he can't because that is what he is supposed to do and not to worry because he will still cuddle with me when he gets big (now that I have that documented he must, right :-)

• He is a morning guy. Almost always awake at 6:00 a.m. 
• He only likes school for the social aspect (too bad you get in trouble for talking and hugging all day long).
• He likes to have cuddle time after school (and I can hear him saying, "mom you are embarrassing me" as I type that).
• He never has time to sit down and eat. He snacks as he goes.
• He thinks bedtime is for the birds, especially when the sun is still awake. 
• He would rather sleep on our bedroom floor than his cozy, cozy bed
• If he could wear cozy sweats and a sweat shirt every day he would. 

(This is the face he gives me when he is done with pictures.)

He is hilarious and continually saying things that make me laugh or catch me off-guard. Some of my favorite things he says:

"I see what you are trying to do here and it isn't going to work!"

(anytime I creatively try to get him to do homework or chores)

"We could certainly incorporate that..."

(when something gives him an idea)

This is such a Mr. L face.

"Seriously?!??!?! You are joking aren't you."

(He doesn't always appreciate my sarcastic self. I can picture his face all scrunched up as he says this.)

"So, what do you have planned for us today"

(always looking for something grand that includes friends)

"According to my calculations, zero does not complicate things so..."

(envision a profound conclusion, while doing math homework)

"This is the best!"..."This is the worst"..."I absolutely love it"..."I am furious right now"

(always verbally expressing his emotions)

The Boy is full of energy, always thinking on his toes, extremely compassionate and loving and has fantastic negotiating skills. Love our almost 8 years old (how can that possibly be?!?!?!). 

Where have I been?

I swear it happened overnight.

I blinked and these two grew up on me.

I wish I could freeze them for just a little while to let the different stages sink in fully. I feel like I haven't slowed down enough lately and now I'm realizing how big they have gotten.

Boy & Girl - Please don't grow up too fast. I just can't handle turning around to realize that you are ten.

And the cutest story to go along with the jacket The Boy is wearing.

A few weeks ago, as we were getting dressed for church, I pulled out this jacket that I had gotten for him a while back but one that he has never worn and asked him if he wanted to wear it. He loves jackets and rushes to get ready if he knows there is a great jacket or sweater to wear. So, he got his jacket on, got all excited, pulled on the bottom of the jacket as if to straighten it out and with the biggest smile on his face said, "I look just like D, don't I?" [for those of you who may not know, D is his birth grandpa]

It was so cute. He was so proud. It totally reminds him of D and now whenever I ask him if he wants a jacket, he says, "the D jacket?"

I Don't Care

The Boy is finally, FINALLY feeling better.

And even better, he is finally sleeping.
He has to be exhausted from the lack of sleep he's had since he's been sick. I swear the medicine they gave him that was supposed to knock him out, had the opposite affect.

He has slept in the last two days.

He slept until 9 today (unheard of for this guy who likes to wake up at 6:45). And I let him. Who cares that preschool starts at 9 and he was completely late. Who cares that I let him take an extra 10 minutes to eat his breakfast. Who cares that we read a book, had cuddles and then got him ready for preschool.

I don't. It was worth every minute. And our entire day will be better because of it.

Start off the Day

It seems like we have the same three things for breakfast almost every single day. . .Cheerios, oatmeal or pancakes. The Girl's favorite is oatmeal. The Boy's is pancakes. That is until recently when The Boy realized that I made my oatmeal a little bit differently. I like my oatmeal with milk but the trick is to pour it over while it is piping hot and without stirring. It makes the oatmeal clump together and it is divine. The Boy noticed and wanted a bite of mine. He was hooked after the first bite and said it was the best oatmeal he had ever eaten. The Girl of course had to have a bite but didn't like it and went back to her creamy, milk stirred in, bowl of oatmeal which she devours in minutes and always wants more. Now every morning when I ask The Boy what he wants for breakfast he says, "oatmeal but with milk please." He knows what he likes and I love that he wants it just like mine.

Finally

The Boy has been sick and hasn't been sleeping. He has been wide awake in the wee hours of the night and then coughs and hacks all night. Poor guy. He has had bags under his eyes and they have been red and watering just telling me that they should be closed. The Boy can run on very little sleep which exhausts me sometimes. And he never slows down, even when he is sick (shouldn't that be a benefit of them being sick :-) He finally, finally gave in this afternoon and took a nap. I am not sure who needed it more. . . him or me. It has definitely been a looooooooonng week for all of us.

Fun times

Two sick kiddos.

One with a cold.

One with croupe.

He is sounding like Darth Vader. And freaking me out.

Just hoping The Girl's stays just a cold.

We Love Her to Pieces

Let me introduce you to Dee.

Dee is The Boy's birth mother.

We have an open adoption and see her and/or her family about once a month. We get together for lunch, movies, the park, birthdays/holidays, even just hanging out.

We love her to pieces.

We are often asked how long we are required to have contact and how much contact we have to have.

This is the thing, we aren't required.

We aren't forced.

We have chosen open adoption and we love it.

We love being a part of theirs lives and having them be a part of ours. We love spending time together and we love sharing all of the different aspects of our lives with them. We love that The Boy will always have that connection and that he can see how much they love and care about him.

They are part of our family. We are part of theirs. Dee is like a sister to me and her parents are just like any other grandparents to both The Boy & The Girl. The Boy and The Girl love them just as much as we do and are always excited to see them. We are all second best to The Boy when D (D's dad) is around. The Boy has D wrapped around his little finger and The Girl is Dee & P's little buddy (P is Dee's mom). We love it.

We couldn't imagine a better relationship, a better situation.

We recently spent the weekend at P & D's house in southern Utah for the second time. I can already hear so many of you saying "what in the world? how could you ever?" We thought the same thing when we first started the adoption process, we never in a million years imagined that it would be THIS open. I still remember going to the adoption classes and thinking to myself, we can never do that. We had many conversations with friends who had open adoptions who we thought were crazy. Now The Boy's adoption is more open than any of theirs and they are the ones thinking that we are crazy :-). But, really we aren't.

The day we first met Dee and her parents, we feel in love with them. We had an instant connection and we never wanted to leave. We talked and talked about all sorts of things and we wondered how it would be to just send letters and pictures through the agency (which is how it was at the time). We hoped that somehow we would be able to find them or they would be able to find us. At the time we were not able to share any identifying information. Thankfully, we were able to get Dee's last name and address at placement (thanks, Dee!) and were later able to email her directly.

We were excited but so nervous the first time we met her for dinner after placement. It was so great though. And from there, we got to know her and her family better and better. They are such great people. And they truly make it easy to have the contact that we do. I know that it doesn't work for everyone nor does it work in every situation but Dee and her family are amazing.

I think what truly makes it work is that we all have a mutual respect for each other and for the role that we are in The Boy's life. We love and respect Dee for blessing our lives with The Boy and her and her family love and respect us as The Boy's parents. We talk about things openly and while our relationship didn't start out being this open, it has grown and evolved over time.

The way we see it is that it is more people who love and adore our children as much as we do. They have a special connection with them and they with us. And we truly appreciate having them in our lives.

What I Realize

As you have probably noticed, I have been MIA this week. I have come here a million different times to tell you about The Girl and The Boy's adoptions and it doesn't seem like anything is really good enough to express what an amazing journey and experience both of their adoptions have been for us. Nothing can truly express the love and gratitude that we have for their birth families. There are no words to describe the immense love and joy that adoption has brought into our lives. And as we celebrated P's birthday this weekend with P & D (Landon's birth grandparents) D said something that really rang so true for me.

He said that no one can truly understand until they have experienced adoption firsthand. Even when you expect them to because they have witnessed the process.
(The Boy's birth mom, Dee was adopted as well so they have experienced two sides of adoption)

How very true that is.

And as close as adoption is to my heart, as much as it has taught me, as much love as it has given me, as much as I adore and love my children and their birth families, and as much as I love talking about adoption, it has made me realize how sacred adoption is to me. It is how my family was and hopefully still will be formed. No one will understand that completely. No one will understand the depth of my testimony of adoption, of our Savior's love for us, and of his underlying hand in the adoption process every step of the way until they have walked those steps with Him and have been able to see His infinite wisdom and love throughout the entire adoption process. Complete trust, faith and following His promptings is what has brought our little family to this point and will continue to do so. Those experiences are so sweet and tender to me that when I think of how miraculous their stories are, I get choked up and teary eyed.

Can I truly express that in writing their stories? I don't know. I'm trying. I just hope I can give them the adequate admiration that they deserve.

Addicted

The Boy (with a little help from daddy) has discovered YouTube. He loves it! Loves It! He will sit on the computer watching video after video and will even tell you which one he wants next. This is his favorite. He has been singing this song all week and it is adorable.

Pics by Landon

The Boy hates. . .did I say HATES having his picture taken lately. What he does love, is taking pictures himself. Forever we have had the Fisher Price Digital camera. Definitely not a high quality camera for sure. But something that it doesn't matter if he drops, throws, leaves on the floor, etc. And forever, The Boy wanted nothing to do with it. Until lately. The Gent decided to upload the pictures from the camera the other day and they just made me laugh. For one, they are all blurry. . .so The Boy because he is constantly on the go. Most of them had all/part/some of The Girl's head in them. . . .they are always right by each other doing what the other one is doing. And they show glimpses of life as The Boy which I absolutely love. He goes around saying, "I can take a picture of that" or when I get my camera he'll say, "And I can get mine" and run and get his FP one.

Silly Silly Kids

The Boy and The Girl are constantly making me laugh. As I was going through some pictures, these pictures completely remind me of them. They scream The Boy & The Girl.

The Girl loves to hide. She laughs histerically when she surprises you and she loves her blankie.




The Boy is always curious and wondering what you are doing. He loves to be silly and loves making funny faces. And his belly laugh is just the best.

I just love these little people. They constantly brighten my day.

Missing His Buddy

This is The Boy, about 9 months old, with his cousin, D. The Boy and D love each other and have always had this special little bond. Always.

About a year ago, D and his mom moved to this loverly place in Oregon.

D with his mom

And that is when The Boy began missing his buddy D. Big time. So, earlier this year, we decided to take a road trip to find his buddy D. The Boy didn't care that it was 14 hours in the car. Whenever he wanted to get out, he would ask, "we are going to D's house, right?" and we would reassure him that we were, that it was just a really long drive. And he was peachy keen THE entire drive (seriously the best he has EVER been in the car).

And when we finally got to Oregon. The Boy and D were ecstatic. They were joined at the hip the entire trip.

They had a great time together and even though D had to remind The Boy a few times not to sit right on him or to just let go of him or to let him sleep, they were sad to have to leave each other. And The Boy has wanted to go back ever since. Whenever we are in the car for more than 20 minutes, The Boy will ask if we are going to D's house. And I remind him how far away D's house really is. The Boy misses D. And if we could drive to see D every weekend we would because The Boy and D love each other so much and really wish they weren't so far away from each other because then they could have movie nights every weekend and they could call each other up at the last minute and go to dinner and they could hang out until they both just fell asleep on the couch.

And so could their moms.

There was This One Day

Back in the day :-) when The Boy started preschool. He was overly excited. He wasn't worried or concerned at all. He woke up ready to start the day and the first thing he wanted was his backpack. He put it on with his PJ's and wanted to go to school. It took everything I had to get him to eat breakfast and actually get him to get dressed for school. And then to take a picture was just completely pushing him over the edge. He was just ready to get to school and asked, "can we go now?" Here is The Boy running (literally) out the door. Not waiting for two seconds for me to adjust the camera.

When we got there, he jumped out of the car and wasn't going to wait for a second for me to even go with him. I tricked him into waiting while I took this. And when he realized he waited for a picture, he was off. Running to preschool. He was in the door and up the stairs to his classroom before I could even make it through all of the other parents and kids. And that was that. His first day of preschool. He never looked back. I didn't get a hug and kiss. He's too grown up for that and I cried about it the whole way to the store because, after all, he should miss me more than that, right?!?!?!? But when I picked him up from school that day, he came running to me full force with his arms open wide and gave me the best hug ever. So, that made up for all of that.